Here is my top 10 list of things that will plague your life and poison your dreams!
In at No.10 is: Living other people’s lives for them.
Tempting as it is to be a people pleaser, its worthwhile pointing out that people pleasers are the No.1 personality type that are likely to grace a therapy room chair. As much as the people that we love are important, you only get one life. Fill it with those people and things that make YOU happy.
Next up is no.9 is: Waiting for the perfect moment.
Don’t buy into the myth of the perfect moment. Moments aren’t perfect; they are what and when you make them. So many people wait for ‘the right time’ when in fact that time may never come unless you make the changes needed to create it. After all, there is a saying that ‘there is never a good time to have a baby’
Close behind at no.8: Dwelling on bitter thoughts.
Everything and everyone you hate rents permanent space in both your head and heart. So if you want to eliminate something or someone from your mind, don’t hate. Instead, disconnect yourself, move on, and don’t look back. The opposite emotion to love is indifference after all.
Chasing behind at no.7. Trying to change too much at once.
You want to improve your life, change the world. change your habits, lifestyle, job. If you want to make a difference in the world, start with the world around you. Making a big difference all at once is usually impossible, and the process of trying is extremely stressful. Start with one habit and go from there.
In at No.6: Using addictive behaviours for fulfilment.
There are two variations of contentment in life – fleeting and enduring. Fleeting behaviours tend to give you that ‘quick fix’ that many of us seek after a long day. However, relying on outside habits for happiness, is prime breeding ground for addictive behaviours. Enduing behaviours are those that come from within, states of mind, beliefs, and acceptance and are formed from healthy behaviours. Using addictive behaviours to regulate happiness is rather like sticking a plaster on a broken leg.
No.5. Becoming obsessed with image alone.
Infatuating yourself with someone simply for what they look like on the outside is like choosing your favourite food based on colour instead of taste. It makes no sense. Being physically attractive is of course important, but how someone makes you feel is by far a longer lasting emotion.
In at No.4 is: Becoming consumed by worries and fear.
It is unlikely that lying upon your death bed you will have wished you had worried more is it not? How much of your life have you wasted stressing about things that maybe have not even existed?? You cannot change other people’s behaviour, only your own so don’t die trying.
No.3. Working for nothing more than payday.
Work without interest is imprisonment. Even if you aren’t super-passionate about your work, you have got to at least be interested in it. When you design a lifestyle in which your work is something you suffer through daily, just to pay your bills, you end up spending your entire life wishing you had someone else’s. Think about it. This is your life; your work will fill a large percentage of it. It’s not all about the money; it’s about you.
No.2. Focussing on problems.
You get more of what you focus on! The Law of Attraction clearly states that whatever you dwell on will come right back to you. So for example, if you focus on not having enough money (rather than the solution of generating more) this will be exactly what you get more of. If a problem is out of your control then you are also wasting valuable resources by stressing about it day and night. Becoming solution focussed is vital to generating lasting happiness.
And finally the winner is… No.1: Radiators Vs Drains?
Who are in your inner circle? How do they make you feel: energised or drained? How much time do you spend having fun or do they really just need a therapist to offload onto? A good friend will always have time to listen to your concerns, however, if you are finding yourself in the therapist role more often than not, maybe it is time to re-evaluate quite what it is that you are getting from this relationship?!
